Who I Think I Am
I am a wanderer...a nameless one at that.I guess you are already aware of that. Yes, I choose to bear no name; names are bound to be forgotten.
I wander through this space called life, watching the mystery held within. But I am more than a blurred figure, devoid of a name.
I am real, both flesh and soul. And despite the darkness of my identity, I believe there is something so much beneath the shroud.
I am a lover, artist, writer, student, son, brother, friend, and yet, I am the wanderer. At times, I cry for a torn heart that's mine;
at times, I hate for the world's being so unreasonable, unfair, and indifferent; at times, I speak of a sorrow unheard, and a sadness unseen;
but most of the times I love with my whole heart those whom I hold dear, laugh at the bittersweet complex simplicity of my life, fight
for those I hold true and valuable, and smile at the blessings smiling back at me...and yet, I am still a wanderer. My words may lead you to believe
so many things about me, about yourself, or about the world revolving before us, but rest assured, I intend only what's good, or what
I think is good. Before me is a journey. I find dignity in fighting, wandering, and working alone, but I find solace in
numbers as well. I am a wanderer, a nameless one at that...
Who Others Think I Am
Through the eyes of someone not sharing a bond of friendship with me, I appear to be nothing. I have no qualms about that, yet
believe I am more than being nothing. Through the eyes of those who raised me up as a son, I appear to be, without bias, a very
good, virtuous, and loving young man whom they are proud of to be their son. Through the eyes of the one who shares with me the
same soul, I am the loud, cheerful, at times completely obnoxious, boy she proudly calls her brother. Through the eyes of those
who have vowed friendship with me, I am the sweet, sensitive, thoughtful, funny yet serious, silent-but-strong, one-of-a-kind
mate they swear they were happy to have had. And so I ask:through your eyes, what might the wanderer be like?
What I Like
The Calling. Goo Goo Dolls. Edwin McCain. Anime. Manga. Alternative Rock. Love Songs. FM Radio Stations. Singing Like My Favorite Bands. Guitars.
Girls. Friends. Philosophy. Theology. Computers. Programming Languages. Java. C. Adobe Photoshop. Macromedia Dreamweaver. Macromedia Flash.
Meeting New People. Da Vinci Code. A Walk To Remember. Harry Potter. Movies. Music. 2b Staedtler Pencils. 0.1-0.5 Uni-pin Felt Tip Pens.
Duncan Sheik. John Mayer. Jason Mraz. Pizza. Beer(Moderate). Chatting.
Blogs. Yahoo Messenger. Friendster. Myspace. Blogger. Food. Pasta. Ice Cream. Cookies and Cream. Agno. Charging. Sweetness. Thoughtfulness.
Open-mindedness. Loyalty. Honesty. Faithfulness. Sense of Humor. Cheerfulness. Appreciation. Sensitivity. Optimism. Cruelty to the Guilty. Wherever
You Will Go. Adrienne. Stigmatized. Iris. Hanging By A Moment. Halflife. Remedy. Barely Breathing. Sleep All Day. No Stopping Us. You and I Both.
Reflective Silence. Being in love. Being loved.
What I Hate
Two Timers. Backstabbers. Hypocrites. Immaturity. Unhealthy Sarcasm. Indifference. Insenitivity. Disloyalty. Untruthfulness. Cruelty to the Innocent. Getting Caught in the Traffic Jam aboard the Jeepney. Prolog.
Calculus. Integrals. Derivatives. Deafening Silence.
What I Hold Dear
God. Family. Friends. Religion. Myself.
What I Fight For
Love. Pride. Friendship.
Who I Really Am
Something yet to be fully discovered.
Boku to jibun wa nikaiwa hoshii
Konban ni kangae mono wo miteru. Sagashite mo ore wa souzan ni naru bakari. Kokoro to tamashii soshite ki wa kantan ni wakarareu no koto wo kibou suru. Kibou suru.
PS. Onegai sensei daisuki na no.
Nameless Wanderer watches...11:03 AM | 2 Eyes on Me
20PAX
1. I am Ellen Cean's boyfriend...a madly in-love one at that...
2. I love eating, pero hinde ako tumataba. Baket???
3. I love drawing a lot. My perfect position for drawing ay...nakadapa. My works look better when I draw them in that position
4. I used to have a whole nation of imaginary friends (when I was a kid).
5. I don't last a day without using the computer (provided there is one that is connected to the net and/or loaded with games).
6. Nahihirapan akong maghanap ng 20 facts about myself. Why? a.) baka dahil nde ko gano kilala sarili ko, or b.) dahil mahirap pag-isipan ang mga bagay na ito pag sapilitan kang tinanong hehe
7. Nung tumigil na kayo sa pagwee-wee sa kama, ako hinde pa hehehe (Guess till what age!...)
8. Nung first year HS ako, tinanong ako sa isang English activity kung sinong Hollywood actress ang gusto kong i-date. Sabi ko Natalie Portman. Ngayon, hindi na. Heheh
9. I am a big fan of Jennifer Love Hewitt -- as an actress, as a singer, and as a comic relief.
10. I am a big fan of Final Fantasy 7 (haven't watched Advent Children? Panoorin mo na!)
11. I enjoy programming a lot.
12. Nihongo wakararetari hanashirareru...chotto dake (i can understand and speak Japanese...only a little though)
13. Nung HS ako, natutulog ako around 9PM - 10PM. Pag 12, late na un grabe. Ngayong HS, pag 12AM na, midnight snack time palang un.
14. Gusto kong pumunta ng London, Paris saka Japan.
15. Nickname ko rin ang mga sumusunod: "Doomer", "Pug", "Cerebral Palsy Kid", "Ambo" (mahahabang salaysayin...)
16. I enjoy watching anime, playing video games, hanging out with friends, and sleeping
17. Kabisado ko anglahat ng keyboard shortcuts ng pallette ng Photoshop (M - marquee, B - pencil/brush, U - polygon...)
18.
19. I love hugs and kisses
20. I love my Ellen Cean so much... :x
itatag ko...? Kung may blog si Mirai Hoshizaki, sya nalang heheh (since natag na lhat ng kakilala ko boohoo!)
Nameless Wanderer watches...9:20 AM | 1 Eyes on Me
Word of the day: Anaphora Resolution
1. I had a nice term. Why?
2. Because I had all 4.0's for my grades, with the sorry exception of one subject (3.0 for ADVANOS)
3. And because Ellen's grades went well, too! That one made me real happy!
4. I'm suffering now from information overload. I'm researching about anaphora resolution as part of our thesis (to develop a natural language translator system). And I can't seem to get my focus as to what parts of the diverse field of anaphora resolution am I to cover really. (You see, not everything abour AR concerns machine translation, but is this justification enough. I need experts to help me. Help...)
5. I'm going out on a date on Friday. Weeee ~ ^_^
6. Yea, six. My birthday. September 6...I'm now nineteeeennn!!
7. I hope the same streak I had this term will apply with all my remaining terms. I am now currently (still) a cum laude candidate, and I'm now aiming for magna. Wish me luck!
8. La na hehe
Nameless Wanderer watches...8:02 AM | 4 Eyes on Me
yami ni himitsu
wakararenai itami sono morau koto kao no ga
nijuichi san ichi go jusan ichi hachi ni
Nameless Wanderer watches...9:56 AM | 3 Eyes on Me
During and after the N months of staleness... (too lazy to compute for N)
1. ... I'm still in love with Ellen
2. ... I've seen the best movie yet: If Only. The bomb! 10/5 stars...
3. ... I feel somewhere in my mind that I am stupid. And I feel bad about it..
4.
5. ... I am in a conflict with myself. Sometimes I'm feeling things that I should not be feeling. Like anger.
6. ... I should feel how to manage myself...and keep cool... be objective always, even when things don't seem what they are
7. ... I have been addicted to DOTA, then kept a distance from it lately
8. ... I am swarmed with work. Big time...
9. ... I'm on a Jennifer Love Hewitt MP3 marathon...(see #2)
10. ... I love Ellen. So very much. It's been like this for a long time. And it feels good...
11. ... I feel so stupid sometimes.
12. ... I am at the same time on a high and feeling down. When will the irony stuff.
13. ... I'm thinking of sleeping. Maybe that will make me feel better
14. ... I want to hug and kiss my sweet Ellen.
15. ... I am in need of help. Please help me.
16. .. I am signing out now.. and for the next N months again perhaps...
Nameless Wanderer watches...10:35 AM | 2 Eyes on Me
To you, my one true heart...
I want everyone to know that I have deeply fallen in love with Ellen Cean.
And for the first time after so long a time of pain and confusion, I have seen in her eyes the renewed clarity of things. And I cannot help myself but smile at the wonder before my eyes.
I know she has made a very beautiful difference in my life, as I feel happiness flood my heart whenever we hold hands. Never will I forget how she touched my heart. When I am with her, I feel that I can stay who I am, at the same time be whoever I want to be. As I hold her close, all I want to tell her is that I want to stay right beside her, watch over her, and build my heart's home around her. When our lips touch, I know I have come to that point where I can bravely say, "I will take care of this girl".
I will always look forward to hearing her energetic laughter over the simplest things we talk about, or how she sticks her tongue and raises her eyebrows over the smallest things we argue over. I can't wait till the scent of her hair carresses my sense of smell, as she so playfully tells me of stories so trivial nevertheless special to me.
To love you has been in fact the dream I always had as I sleep through my nights. From the day you told me how much you feel for me, I gladly knew dreams indeed do come true.
I love you, my dear Ceanne. No words can ever really amount to how much I feel.
And I want everyone to know that I have deeply fallen in love with Ellen Cean...
... my best friend, my girlfriend, my loved one...
...my one true heart.
Nameless Wanderer watches...11:45 AM | 1 Eyes on Me
214
I'm quite tired too structure my thoughts, so i'll just list what I've got to say.
1. I've been asking myself "Will I be someone of worth in the future?" more often than usual. Maybe the thought that I'm past half my college life and still I can't feel I'm up to something good makes me ask those things. I just hope the answer will be yes.
2. There's so much to do. Somehow, I've imburdened myself with a lot of duties lately. I wish to let go of some of the inurgent stuff in my life.
3. I am smiling more than usual now. I have her to thank for this.
4. I am looking forward to an outing this summer, despite the fact that I will be taking OJT that time...
5. Or, maybe, just an overnight soon...
6. Yahoo Messenger audibles are bad for your health. Try putting your volume to 100%. Then, turn off all the lights and divert your attention from YM (like say, update your blog). Then, have someone play the "Giggles" audible when you're not paying attention.
7. L'arc-En-Ciel rocks.
Parking my brain somewhere...till next time, everyone.
Nameless Wanderer watches...9:18 AM | 2 Eyes on Me
Wednesday, June 30, 2004
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21%evil
nathan
svet.lana.sexy
kryss.sexy
kanuharaine
excommunicated